Life is good

OK, I got over the fuss of having my husband buying my artwork at the auction. He's been coming home telling me about the comments he's received. At first, I cringe when he says that someone commented. But all the comments have been positive. Not that someone would crap on the boss's wife's artwork ;-)

Yesterday was my birthday. It was odd to be alone all day. I miss birthdays at the office when everyone made a fuss, my husband sent the most gorgeous flowers that made everyone jealous (he sent even more gorgeous flowers this year, but there's no one but me to enjoy them - I love them anyway!), and we always had silly decorations or went out to lunch together. I had a lot of time to reflect on life. A dear friend called to wish me happy birthday and ended up sharing a lot of personal struggles she's wrestling with. I wish I'd had something profound to say to make her feel better. It put my own fussing in perspective and helped me appreciate the things that go well every day.

My son was very thoughtful and wanted to get a gift that was related to my artwork. My husband knew that I'd been resisting working on more clay projects because I just have a hard time working the clay by hand (my fingers are getting older than the rest of me) and the manual pasta roller I have is a dilapidated piece of junk. He did a lot of research, unbeknownst to me, and conspired with my son to give me a pasta roller attachment for the big Kitchenaid mixer in the kitchen. It was funny - when I opened the package and saw what it was, all I could think of was the fact that my son hates pasta. He also got me a wooden rack for draping the fresh pasta as well, making me even more confused. I guess I wasn't hiding it well and my husband told me that he'd read a lot of comments by artists on the internet about how they used this attachment just for their clay and found the wooden draping gizmo to be very helpful in terms of where to put their sheets of clay. What a thoughtful bunch! He doesn't have time to blink these days, but took the time (as non-techie as he is) to do the research. I am in a much better position to get started on another art doll with a mechanical means of conditioning the clay. Yeah!

As a charming end to my birthday, Kevin announced as he was about to go to bed, "Oh yeah, I get to give you 49 whacks!" and we proceeded to have the most hysterically funny ten minutes of running around the house and whooping each other until he felt he got to 49 (with some very creative counting and after I got in a few tweaks myself).

Now all I have to do is get through Halloween with a houseful of teenagers carving pumpkins, eating pizza and watching a dreadful horror movie while I cower in another room. I wonder how many pounds of pumpkin seeds are going to be tossed during the feisty seed fight that I'm sure is going to take place. Argh. :-)

My daughter wasn't able to come home for my birthday, and told us that she lost the draw for time off for Thanksgiving and Christmas as well. It has begun. She's been on her own for a while, but we've always managed to do something like have Thanksgiving on Friday or have her drive up on Christmas morning. As long as we were together, it didn't matter when. I laughed at her last year when she asked me to take a photo of her with her cell phone while she tore into a big turkey leg. She sent it to her vegetarian boyfriend with a caption that read something along the lines of, "MEAT!!!" I know that the time will come when she will have her own family and start her own traditions that won't include coming home. Kevin is in high school now, so we know time is growing shorter with him as well. Thank heavens I have my art to keep me busy. I think I'll be taking a million classes when he's gone, although right now he says, "What do you mean leave and live on my own? You guys are awesome!" :-) What a cutie. I'll enjoy what I can get.

What was the point?

I was so proud of myself contributing two pieces of my artwork to the Boys & Girls Club auction event this past weekend. This is the favorite of all of the art dolls I've made. Showing my work in public and having my name on it was really, really hard for me. However, my husband, in his effort to make me feel good, decided he was going to bid on the work so that he could buy one or both pieces for his display in his office. I didn't even get the chance to see if there was any interest or what others may have felt was a reasonable bid for the artwork of someone they didn't know. All I know is that he made high enough bids that he "won" both pieces. I don't even know if there was a single bid on either piece.

He just didn't get it. How does one sigh on ones blog?

Inspiration requires waterproof mascara

Inspired to try something new after watching a show about artists, I wandered into our local (and usually sadly lacking) fabric & craft store. I found a few books that I thought would encourage exploring materials I don't usually work with and figured, what the heck, they would be good reading while I sat waiting (and waiting and waiting) in the car to pick up Kevin after school. I can't say I've ever been moved by an art or craft book to the point of tears, but I was - twice in two days - with the book, "Taking Flight" by Kelly Rae Roberts. She wrote in my voice, articulating my thoughts and fears and worries, but also encouraged pushing to get beyond those things that hold us back. I must admit that this is the first time I've ever read one of my art books from cover to cover. I cried in the car (thank goodness for dark sunglasses), and then got weepy again this morning as I read. The realization that I'm not alone in these very specific fears gave me a sense of inspiration that I have not experienced before. I totally related to her expression of fear of producing art that people might not like, or that they might not want to buy. I have a real fear of others thinking that I've got real nerve putting a dollar figure on my work because it's not worthy. I am nervous about attending a class or workshop, worried that I'll be the only person in the room with no ideas, I won't know anyone, will feel like a dork sitting by myself at lunch - all the silly stuff that we experience in junior high! Kelly made specific suggestions to get past all of this, including online groups and getting up the courage to attend classes and workshops. While I've asked my friend Amy, and will ask Susie M, to attend as well, I am determined to break out and go whether it's with friends there or alone. Truthfully, it would be more fun with friends (especially because the courses all teach stuff outside of all our areas of experience), but I think I'll have tons of fun anyway.

I owe Kelly Rae Roberts a big, fat thank you.

Jekyll & Hyde blogs

Life isn't so great these days. I feel like I should have a second and very secret, private blog where the ugly and grouchy "Hyde" me can just rant and fuss and complain and rant some more about everything that makes me miserable so that I can stick to the topic of art and good stuff in life on this one. The problem is finding a way to be sure that the Hyde blog gets blown up at some point so no one thinks this is all I am - a pile of ticked off grumpiness.

OK, got that out of my system.

I finished my piece for the fundraiser auction and turned it over to them. That was a really, really big step for me. I've also invested in a few new books with information about stuff I've never tried before so that I can push myself out of the comfort zone and expand the old artsy horizons. Today, I'm going to start another ATC and try some new medium. What fun! It'll be a small project that will give me a sense of satisfaction quickly. I'm also going to contact a few long-distance artsy friends to see if I can talk them into the Art & Soul gig in Portland next October. That would be a blast! Oooh, I can be positive when I try. ;-)